Remembering Junk

I’m famous for remembering stuff that is completely useless, yet I can’t remember things I really need to know. Like where my car keys are. Or remembering if my doctor’s appointment is at 9 a.m. Tuesday or 3 p.m. Thursday.

Cast of the Mary Tyler Moore show, helping me turn the world on with her smile...

But boy can I remember the least important stuff in the world. I can sing you the entire theme song to the Mary Tyler Moore show. (“Who can turn the world on with her smile……”)

I know what book Diane on the show Cheers was writing. (“Jocasta’s Conundrum”)

The cast of Cheers

I know what the temperature was in New Bedford, Mass. on Aug. 2, 1975. (107 degrees, a New England record high)

I remember what my Aunt Irene’s favorite grocery store was in the 1960s (South End Food Market in Rutland, Vermont; long since gone out of business.)

I know what the number one hit song was in the autumn of 1971 (“Maggie May” by Rod Stewart)

Rod Stewart belts out "Maggie May"

You get the point. Does anyone know how to rewire one’s brain to remember important things, and, if I have to, discard what I really don’t need?

After all, I’d rather remember the important phone call I have to make at work tomorrow, than the entire lyrics to Melanie’s song, “Brand New Key”

“…..cuz, I got a brand new pair of roller skates, you got a brand new key!”

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