Fashion Schmashion: Advert Fails

Ever notice in magazine fashion spreads, all the male models look angry and the women with them look bored?

Ok, you guys, just get over yourselves already.

I was contemplating this after my blog post last week on how I somehow watched “Project Runway” the clothing fashion design “reality” show.

I always laugh at magazine fashion spreads as the most ridiculous thing in advertising.

Some say it’s art, some say it’s concepts. I say it’s just weird people doing weird things.

Back to the angry men/bored women.  Classic example is the Versace ad, which is the first photo in this post. Is the guy angry because the woman is bored and pouty?  Or is the woman bored because the guy is angry again? Something to ponder. But not for long.

Why did you buy me these shoes?! I HATE them!!!

Versace is my favorite fashion line because their advertisements are so over the top. Let’s contemplate the situation with the woman in the Versace ad about to bash the other woman with the shoe, shall we?

What led to this situation? Is the angry woman holding the shoe mad because the woman on the floor has a nicer dress? Or is she just crabby because she has had to diet so much to be skeletal enough to be in a Versace ad?

Why is the woman who is about to be hit with that lethal looking shoe laughing? “Ha,!” she says. “You think I’m afraid of that cheap stilleto? I’m still prettier than you even if you poke my eye out with that thing.”

At least the two women in the next photo, a Miu Miu ad, are geting along better than the Versace ladies.

I guess it’s a case of solidarity between the two. Somebody has shaved off their eyebrows, and their holding onto each other for support to get through that trauma.

Makeup department! We need more eye shadow, Stat!!!

Plus, the eye shadow factory they were standing next to exploded, smearing their faces with interesting colors and shredding their outfits. I think that’s what happened, anyway.

I could go on and on with this, but I’ll give you one  more. The last photo in this post is a Mulberry ad.

Our two heroines seem lost in the woods after a terrible explosion or plane crash really did a number on their hair. (There seems to be a lot of explosions and fights in these fashion houses. Maybe I should put in a call to OSHA)

Are these two women hiking the woods of Vermont spreading fashion sense. Maybe they are trying to field dress deer.

Anyway, these two women really, really want to SHOP, and their big handbags need to be stuffed with all kinds of expensive merchandise.

But they seem to have landed outside of their usual haunts in Paris, New York or Milan.

The two women  look like they are somewhere in the Vermont woods, probably not far from Hardwick, Barnet or Island Pond.

It looks like November in the picture, so it’s probably deer hunting season. They heard that hunters field dress their deer.

These two women, dying to be helpful, probably want to help field dress the deer to make sure they are as fashionable as possible.

Boy, are these ladies in for a surprise.

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